The Adventures of Wolfboy

Courage

You know what annoys the shit out of me? When people, especially teammates, are constantly putting each other down. I mean seriously? That person is part of your team. HELP THEM INSTEAD OF PUTTING THEM DOWN. How do you expect to win as a team if they “suck”. And what these people who say they suck don’t realize is that at least these people have the courage to go out there and give their all no matter the circumstances. So what they’re not as good as you? I’m pretty sure in a few years no one will care about your victories. But the courage to go out and do something knowing you could fail. That’s a personal victory that lasts a lifetime. And honestly, it’s the shit like what happened today being the reason I truly didn’t want to do wrestling this year. Grades and leadership did factor into it, but honestly it’s crap like today. The fact that the coaches on the team are all assholes and pick favorites, the people on the team are assholes, and the people who help out are assholes. I honestly miss the sport. It was a great experience and taught me to rely on myself and help me with confidence and courage, but I can’t stand the environment. 

A venting, indirect retaliation.

You go and tell him that you thought I fucking mugged you, making me feel bad even though I wasn’t trying to mug you intentionally. I felt bad about it. Bad enough to personally message you and apologize for what I did and let you know that I meant no harm. That due to circumstances it may look like I mugged you. Then you have the fucking balls to post about how I’m being fucking immature and how I’m out to get you or some shit?! For something I didn’t purposely do?! And you talk this shit a few fucking days after I find out what you did with him. Where the FUCK do you get off talking about me, saying I gave you unnecessary looks and I’m being immature knowing the shit you did?!?! Well here’s being immature. I hope you’re fucking happy now. You win. I feel like shit. Every fucking time I think about it I begin to cry. I feel stupid, destroyed, kicked down, beaten, hurt, and vulnerable. You. Fucking. Win. Congratulations.

 

I’m so fucking pissed off right now. Are you fucking serious?! You’re gonna fucking ground me because YOU’RE too fucking LAZY to walk a few extra fucking steps to put the paper towels away?! You’re gonna fucking ground me because YOU’RE fucking home all day and YOU’RE too fucking lazy to throw the trash out while I haven’t been home earlier than 9:30 these past few days and I do homework after until 12!!! I barely fucking eat! Don’t fucking talk to me about how you do so much shit! All you fucking did while you’re on disability was cook! I’m doing a ton of shit to get into college like you fucking want me to!! I’m so sick of your double standard shit. And you wonder why I hate you. You seriously wonder why? Think about it. For the past 10 or so years you’ve done nothing but been there to kick me while I was down and shit and now all of a sudden you’re gonna play the understanding father instead of the overbearing tyrant?! Fuck that shit! I think it’s fucking amazing how you can psychoanalyze my family members like you’re so fucking amazing psychologist but you don’t see what’s wrong with your own damn son. No. Fuck that. I’m not yours. And I never will be. I thought things were going good. But fuck that. You will NEVER understand.

Where the fuck do you get off talking to me like that?! Are you kidding me?! You cannot be serious. YOU were the one who told me to do what I felt! I know me better than you know me! And you’re gonna send me shit like this talking like you know me so well?! Not only that but you think I would actually like you more if you’re talking to me like shit?! You have got to be fucking kidding me! I did what YOU and EVERYONE ELSE fucking said! I went with it! But I stopped feeling it and that’s my fault?! I told you every fucking day at least five times a day that YOU were gonna get hurt and that I was confused and not in a good place. WHAT DID YOU TELL ME?! You told me to just go with it. I knew that I would hurt you in the end and I tried to tell you, but you wouldn’t listen. And now you have the fucking nerve to talk to me like this?! What the fuck?! Not only that but you PROMISED me that you would still be my friend and wouldn’t be mad at me if it turned out I wasn’t feeling it anymore. PROMISED ME. Promises mean a lot to me. And don’t even dare try and turn this shit on me. Don’t go off thinking that none of that mattered to me because honestly it did. It comforted me and we even discussed that it was a rebound for me. Sure that sounds bad but WE TALKED ABOUT IT. And I told you I didn’t want to hurt you. I TOLD YOU ALL OF THIS STUFF BEFORE HAND! What gives you the right to talk to me like you know me so well? YOU CROSSED A LINE WITH THAT SHIT. I gave you enough warning signs and you can’t even get mad at me for falling for it because you pushed. You kept asking me if I wanted to hang out and do stuff. I mean honestly? I just got out of a relationship. What did you expect me to do? I told you this too and you said that it didn’t matter. To just go with it. And I did. And another thing, don’t get off thinking that I intentionally tried to hurt you. Like I said a million times just now I warned you. I gave you hella warnings. Not only that but I did feel like shit and a bad person when I had to tell you I didn’t return the feelings, but now I’m pissed off because you just crossed a fucking line.